‘…the beauty of not knowing
how you feel is that one
day you’ll realise that
not knowing was the only
way you’d find all the
feelings that were meant to stay,’
I am feeling unsettled this week….I have an inkling why… the nerves are beginning to build, anticipating this weekend’s Belvoir Art Trail where, on Saturday 4th May, I will be at Blue Owl Art gallery, Grantham, Lincolnshire.
‘Follow Shadows, Chase the Sun’
With my logical head on, I am happy with the work I am taking; this last series in particular really expresses my authentic self (sorry, getting a bit arty farty as my OH would say…) However, that inner critic, that small voice – which I am trying really hard to shush – is whispering some not so sweet nothings in my ear….’Who do you think you are? Pretending to be an artist…no-one will like your work and as for sales, don’t make me laugh…’.
My self-confidence is a work in progress; acknowledging to myself that I am happy with this work and don’t necessarily need external validation is a start – although compliments are always gratefully received (I am only human after all) …. but, but…I am striving to make a business out of my art, so sales are a requirement…and the thought of sales, or the lack of, is making the nerves jangle…
As a result, I am finding it difficult to settle to new work, to really get stuck in, … That’s why the mono-printing I am doing as part of Instagram’s #the100dayproject is great…material requirements are few, it takes no time at all to set up and I can produce lots of prints in a short space of time…
Another way I am being creative is with my small collage sketchbook…again, material requirements are few – a sketchbook, glue and scraps of paper, magazine cuttings, old sketches and prints – of which I have many…
Again, as the sketchbook is small, I can make several collages quickly, and feel as if I have been creative, producing work; time will tell if the mono-printing and collage work will develop further, but as small ‘projects’, they are invaluable…if only for settling my nerves….
I don’t know what my next work will be, just as I don’t know how successful the Art Trail will be – it’s the first time both myself and Blue Owl Art gallery have participated – so it’s all a journey into the unknown… but I recently came across this…
‘I have come to accept the feeling of not knowing where I am going. And I have trained myself to love it. Because it is only when we are suspended in mid-air with no landing in sight, that we force our wings to unravel and alas begin our flight. And as we fly, we still may not know where we are going to. But the miracle is in the unfolding of the wings. You may not know where you are going, but you know that so long as you spread your wings, the wind will carry you,’ – C. Joybell
I love the idea of unfolding my wings and trusting the wind will carry me… to see where the breeze takes me….
I will no doubt write a post about the Art Trail…so keep following…also, if you want more of my ramblings, offers and news, don’t forget to sign up to my mailing list via the link top right…